Goals...Beware, It is a Bit Deep

A little bit of coloring to start off my first morning of February

February has arrived and certainly not without some crazy winter storm weather!  So far, we were only welcomed with some freezing rain.  This made for another "Snow Day" which will need to be made up at the end of the school year.  Bummer!  I do not envy many others in much of the Midwest that are forcasted to get over a foot of snow!  No thank you! 

I am so happy that February is here but, I feel as if January came and went without me even experiencing it.  I laid awake in bed last night unable to sleep because my mind would not quit.  The thought that I had wasted an entire month that I had planned to create some new goals and begin the year with a fresh start.  Oh, my goodness!  The feeling of panic and discouragement set in...thus triggered my brain to go completely hog wild!  Does this happen to anyone else?

I will take you on a short little trip through my mind last night...

The thoughts began something like this...I was thinking about what a great time I had at book club.  I thought about the conversations that unfolded and the joy I felt as I was beginning to build new friendships with these great women that invited me into their group.  The comfort of this feeling soon took a curve downward for me personally, of conversations of weight loss and exercise.  My thought process slipped down into that way too familiar tunnel of disparaging body image that I hold of myself.  Ughhh....I ate too much and haven't been to the gym in several days.  I have got to set some goals and become very strict and disciplined about achieving them.  When I am feeling horrible about myself, it spills over into every aspect of my life.  I can't believe that I am exposing this part of myself that is a constant battle each and every day.  I will tell you that I would do just about anything not to feel this way.  Unfortunately, it is not that easy to just push away these thoughts.  Some days are better than others but, it is always there.  I have become an absolute master at hiding this from even the people closest to me.  Enough said about that for now. On to the next thought...

I am such a planner and I realized that I absolutely must get some goals written in my calendar.  I had every intention of having this done a month ago!  So, I began thinking about goals specifically and remembered a framed piece that we have had for years that has yet to be hung someplace in this house. 

Here it is...



I just love what this says...



Alright, I am ready to fill up my calendar...

These are some upcoming happenings for me:

1) Co-ed dodge ball...I can't wait to feel that rush of competitiveness of team sports again! 

2)  I may do my first trail race that is practically out my back door.  Now that is what I call convenience!  See here for details.

3)  Okay, now this one has me so very excited...Warrior Dash.  Check here for more    info. I have always been up for a little excitement and a challenge.  This here offers all of the above and more.  Anyone else up for this challenge?  I would love some company!

4)  Continue fighting the body image blahs with everything I have got.  One day I have the vision of overcoming this day to day struggle. I hope to look in the mirror one day and be completely content at what is smiling back at me.  We all have struggles of some sort and this just happens to be my toughest one.  It is one of those things that I have hidden so well because I feel that no one can truly understand the battle unless you have fought it yourself.  Just recently, someone very, very close to me, I won't name names, said that they thought I was in a rut dressing in workout clothes everyday (Hello...it is because I am going to the gym! Something that this individual is not) and that I was like those people on the T.V. show, "What Not to Wear".  Seriously?!  It is these things that set me back even worse.  The last time I looked around at the gym, I didn't see anyone running in heels and an evening gown.  Thanks for the confidence booster though!  Not so much. I will let it eat at me for awhile and eventually that statement will run off my back. It just hurts when people you care about say such things.  It happens.  It wasn't the first time and it won't be the last.  Another reason for me to keep my determination  in whatever I am focused on doing.  There is nothing that pleases me more than proving someone wrong when they doubt me. 

Goals are something that really help me to keep the focus.  Yes, we can all say things like, " I will eat only healthy food and hit the gym every single day".  The problem with that, is simply the fact that life sometimes gets in the way and things do not always go exactly how we had planned it.  Being a total planner, this is also something I am learning to adapt to as well.  I am 100% confident that putting your goals in writing and being able to visualize them, helps one to achieve them.  It is when we don't write it down, that it often slips by the wayside and becomes more likely to be unachievable.  The goal that I set to achieve that sticks in my mind is when I ran a half marathon last May.

Even the fact that I was sick for over a month in the middle of training and had to switch events, I never lost sight of the goal I was working to achieve.  When you have the determination and the vision of achieving something, you WILL achieve it.  NEVER give up on your dreams!

Welcome to February, my friends!  What are your upcoming goals?  Do you have any tricks or advice to keeping them and achieving them?  I would love to hear from you.  :)

Enjoy your day and I hope you keep warm and survive the monster storm!  :-)